My name is Maddie and I'm 18, from Brisbane and a first year engineering/science student.

literaturewank:

"Your mom is gaaay!"

"Which one?"

"…"

[stunned silence]

Some kids are arguing on my street, one has lesbian moms. I fucking can’t breathe.

co-ver:

Video games are great, they let you try your craziest fantasies. For example, on the sims, you can have a job and a house

rnicrophone:

bombing:

cop: who the hell ordered all these pizzas

me: you said i got one phone call

image

chromeofficial:

nothing is more satisfying than someone walking right past ur hiding spot in hide and seek

elicrotch:

v0ciferation:

checks grades

*bastille voice* how am i gonna be an optimist about this

well if you close your eyes

disneykin:

does anyone actually track their periods because i dont im too lazy and its just like this really terrible surprise that i dont want every month and me trying to convince myself that theres no way its been 4 weeks already

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